|
_POSTED_BY admin
|
|
Wednesday, 23 July 2008 |
With Tip and Alicia in college and spending more and more time with their father and Sherry out at the ranch Faye gradually realised that she was on a hiding to nothing. It still puzzled her how Ron had managed to vacate her life and start afresh so effortlessly . It hurt incredibly but most of all it mystified her. Where had the money for the Ranch come from?
Sherry had also been Faye's only lifelong friend but there had been no space to compute what had happened as Ron and Sherry had so quickly incorporated the kids into their new life that Alicia had thrown a blueberry smoothie container across the kitchen and screamed ' Jesus, will you fucking lay off Sherry mom ,' and stormed off within a few weeks of the split .
Faye had desperately wanted to confide her hurt and pain to her daughter but as she'd mopped up the blueberry juice she'd finally grasped that the intimacy just wasnt there.
Alicia had simply stepped out of her womb and needed to walk away. Tip had fallen out of her in the dark of night and become inextricably caught up in himself. Who knows if he was happy. Worlds had emerged from worlds but there didnt seem to be much connection.
Faye rushed to the washroom to throw up again. The nausea wracked her and her tingling freezing skin made her feel so trapped inside herself , old and hollow.
She'd retreated into one downstairs room of the house. It really wasnt a conscious decision just a reactive way of preserving energy. At first the familiar no longer shared surroundings tormented her but Rita , a hawkish neighbour , had dropped by a few times to talk then started asking if Faye really needed this or that household item and very quickly exited her life too with a truckload of furniture that would only have triggered bad memories and more gushing anyway. Rita's brothers had taken the beds.
The house was so cold.They'd always meant to put down carpet but Ron had just never got round to doing it.
And now she was leaving.
Faye surveyed the kitchen for the last time. It had dated. She saw that now. The pine panneling was definitely no longer cool. It looked very 1970's and insignificant.
Driving away from the house Faye looked down at her map. She'd calculated it was about 850 miles to Rachel from Cheyenne but figured she'd make the Utah/Nevada border on the I-80 by nightfall. She had the duvet in the car just in case she couldn't find a cheap motel room. The duvet would certainly come in handy for camping out around Area 51. Faye had even treated herself to a pair of second hand high powered binoculars from Pawn City. If there was anything out there to find she was sure she'd find it as she couldnt believe that the world revolved around routine disaster and emptiness. She was sure there had to be more to it than that and besides there was still some deep submerged undamaged part of her psyche that had always known that it was her destiny to communicate across vast distances and reach out beyond the stars.
place your links here
hey it costs some to keep this site going so if you have a dollar or two to spare we would sure appreciate it. Click Here to DonatemfBeer Joomla! Plugin
|
|
Last Updated ( Friday, 22 August 2008 )
|
