lifeisbrutallyunfair.com

Note to JC

_POSTED_BY redstarfist

Sunday, 09 March 2008

singularity, by slamback,flickr

I would be quite delighted if Jesus

Returned once again,

At this instant,

And swept me up in

The Great Rapture.

It certainly feels like now

Would be the perfect time.

God knows I’m ready.

I’ll never change my nature…

I’ll never employ warped confidence

Or buy into the culture of false self-satisfying positivity

Birth consciousness in the 21^st century

Is nothing more than a prison sentence for me.

Denial

Escapism

Distraction

Makes the world go round

I’m ready for nature to react

And equalize

And take the stance of a revolutionary.

WAKE UP SLEEPY MASSES!

WAKE UP!

This article was commissioned by a well known energy drinks company

Comments

Add New

RSS

anna	\|2008-04-09 00:59:09

I most definitely think its time we ressurected Jesus the Rrvolutionary .

dogme95 - merry pranksters

|2008-04-09 04:21:38

I love how you can't tell whether or not this is supposed to be a joke, black
humor is a survival tool that I learned to work with a long time ago, it's
strange how the most depressing people in the world often turn out to be the
funniest. I suspect that redstarfist was both laughing and crying when he/she
wrote this. You know, there are a lot of people out there who will never have
to deal with the burden of this kind of thinking. But it looks like you guys
already covered that subject in your piece about bourgeois sentimentality.

cheers

Anonymous

|2008-04-09 05:40:02

these people are fucked because they have no faith

anna	\|2008-04-09 07:48:19

In 'Meditations and Mystics of the Steppes ' J.L. Lucasz roughly sets out the
basic requirements for faith as.

A belief in the power of belief.

A belief
is the need for such powerful beliefs.

A belief in such beliefs being a means
for aquiring and understanding truths.

It therefore really doesnt matter for me
what state of mind redstarfist was in when s/he wrote this blog , what matters
is whether we believe it helps us towards a truthful understanding of how things
are and what it is in our nature to be. I think we all yearn for rapture in our
own ways.

sy	\|2008-04-09 07:57:34

Not really religious at all here, well apart from maybe going to church at
Christmas and Easter with the family and that's more to placate my mom and dad
than anything else so I find it difficult to be inspired by this kind of stuff.
Ok I'm not going to dismiss it out of hand as bulshit but how does it really
help us navigate through life?

Where is the evidence that religion or
religious beliefs have helped us at all?

I've read the bible and it just reads
like the memoir of a group of suspicious violent apes.

Religion profoundly
depresses me!

theo - jesus - more baby than boom

|2008-04-09 11:24:24

Jesus was only 33 when he died - not even middle aged - so although Christians
can say he was firstly and foremostly a Man who struggled with the human
condition and point to this as his supreme validation, Jesus wasnt exactly
forced to endure and contend with the experience of ageing in society , he was
always destined to die a young man's death, horrendous admittedly, but it
launched Christianity and transformed him into an icon , something that probably
would not have happened if he'd survived to age 76 , outlived all his potential
carers, developed senile dementia and gone out in a shitty diaper gagging on an
oxygen mask.

If this imagery offends , then consider this, right now the
babyboomer generation are hurtling towards retirement as the majority social
group
with nothing but the dollar to keep them out of hell.

I wonder is
religion going to influence the social policy decision making around
accomodating and caring for the babyboomers? I wonder but like Anna I really
dont want to hang around long enough to find out.

BoobleHead

|2008-04-09 12:08:09

The Jesus Bobble Head is a plastic bobble-headed tribute to a remarkable
man. Humbly dressed in common robes, Jesus stands 7-1/2" tall
and offers a gesture of blessing with his hand. Put him on your
dashboard and he just might inspire you to exercise patience and
forgiveness on the highway. Comes in a window box with
fascinating Jesus quotes and history.

.95

Pleasantville kid

|2008-04-09 12:11:14

At last a Jesus doll for the rest of us

frank

|2008-04-09 12:18:23

Debbie Harry's Rapture was one of the weirdest
songs and video's ever...

DOS	\|2008-04-09 13:43:03

these people are just dreaming and scheming of a way to get off this planet so
that they don't have to deal with the responsibility or inconvenience of having
to be alive, or age without dignity, and you know what, it makes absolute sense
to me.

we all need our escapist fantasies.

Gabe - Jesus on Main Street

|2008-04-09 23:35:05

The fat black dude who worked the door of the Green Crocodile bar violently
heaved the guy with the beard through it and gave him a contemptuous push that
sent him spawling on the sidewalk. ' I dont care if you havent touched a drop of
wine in 2,000 years motherfucker ' he said ' you dont fucking puke over the
clientelle on my shift'.

Jesus hit the sidewalk hard but managed to break the
fall with his hands. He had a cut lip but it felt as if he had broken a couple
of fingers and ribs. The old wounds on his hands had held out though. He winced
as he struggled to regain his feet , still a bit worse the wear for drink.

Aberdeen, Washington state was proving a bit rougher than the Bethlehem of
his youth. He suddenly regretted drinking with the Thrift Store manager , the
guy was a fucking meshuggener and he'd made off with a badly made up
trans-sexual and most of Jesus' money too. The guy was a captain in the
Salvation Army or something. Jesus was pissed, his old man had sent him back
down to earth to die of old age to redeem the babyboomers and within a couple of
hours of hitting main street he was out of money, had busted ribs and a calling
card of a Columbian pole dancer named Mimi to lead him into temptation.

Staggering to the kerb Jesus looked in a car wing mirror to check out his
reflection. He didnt look too bad for a 33 year old Jew who had been dead for
two millennia but he saw that the busted lip and beard made him look like a
jerk.

The beard would have to go.

He hadnt seen anyone else wearing one and
he was starting to feel a little paranoid. Back in the Roman occupied promised
land beards had been more or less compulsory but here, people had faces as
smooth as childrens until their mid 30's. No , he didnt look too bad for a 33
year old , he just looked a lot older than the locals as he'd never had access
to moisturiser.

He really wasnt down with living another forty odd years on
planet earth either.

In his native judea people had had the decency to drop
dead in their mid forties tops whereas here even the street people made it into
their 60's and brimmed with good health.

Walking back towards the Motel 8 he'd
booked into Jesus wondered what the fuck he was going to do with his remaining
years.
He had no real hobbies. The salvation of humankind which had been his
enduring passion for the first third of his life, no longer seemed so
appealling. Times had changed. He also wasnt so sure about saving people for
the eternal life , didnt these guys live long enough already?

Ditto for
performing miracles. He realised with so much time to kill he'd really have to
pace himself or he'd quickly burn out or risk losing the interest of his
audience.

And then there was Mimi.....

Jesus suddenly felt very resentful.
He's remained celibate right up to the crucifiction , it was part of the deal of
fulfilling the role of pure sacrificial lamb of Torah prophecy but hey, having
to resist getting laid for almost half a century in the age of viagra? that was
just too much. You could push a guy so far.

In the lobby of the Motel 8 Jesus
asked the clerk if the motel had a wireless network. The man stared back
blankly, clearly not understanding a word. Jesus cursed under his breath, the
hotel managers were bad enough in his day but these fucking Asians were worse.
They had no concept of customer service. He made a mental note to check out the
Holiday Inn Express up the street as it had a heated indoor pool , laundry
facilities and something he as a former desert wanderer still found totally
fucking amazing, an ice machine.

At least he reasoned he would be comfortable
in his old age ..

Gabe was slumped on the bed channel hopping when he let
himself into his room.

' Did you give that thrift Store guy the money ' he
asked

Jesus was confused .

Gabe raised his voice ' Hello , earth to J.C, he
was supposed to take the money so you could live out your days in poverty and
humility'.

Jesus rolled his eyes and groaned. ' Fuck ! exactly how long do I
have to put up with this shit Gabe?

But there was no answer just the static of
the untuned tv because when Jesus lowered his eyes again Gabe had gone.

jillian - I roared!

|2008-04-10 02:12:19

You guys are so irreverent!
This stuff is funnier than most people will ever
realize.

old major

|2008-04-10 12:37:15

most revolutions have their benjamins and they are no fools, they may feign
being such for short term advantage but they tend to survive most revolutions
with their pianos and coffee tables intact

in the 3d world donkeys also do well
in environments like Death Valley

also, outside of animal cruelty, which is
just plain wrong, donkeys largely only suffer because they perceive themselves
as doing so, its a an age old donkey trait

Write comment

Name:

Email:

Title:

UBBCode: